Poems about cook


№ 1198403

How I became a cook at sea

How I became a sea-cook

I have been a high ranking officer in the foreign legion
I have also been a sea master and a captain-lieutenant
In the American air force, flying anything from helicopters
To transport planes and jet bombers
I was in Vietnam when my moment of glory came, when general
Westmoreland's helicopter got problem and had to land
In a clearing, in panic radio silence was broken and
The North Vietnamese army moved in, it was then my expertise
Kicked in I knew the area used a small chopper and saved
Him and his next in command, the pilot, was left to fend
For himself- he made it to the Mekong river and was picked up.
Westmorland was an ill-tempered man complained he could
Smell alcohol on my breath- how else to fight this stupid war.
They gave me a medal and kicked me out, but I was still
Employed by the foreign legion who gave me medals too before
Transferring me to secret service duty.
My job was to find soldiers of the legion who had absconded
And committed crimes while in uniform.
The order was clear, bring them back or silence them,
But I'm not suited for this work, so I quit and became a cook in
The merchant navy.

cook,  sea.

Author: jan oskar hansensapopt
Date: 27/03/2020

№ 1192011

How to cook a gourmet dinner: (does anyone know what gourmet means? You know, there is a chance I'm not qualified to give advice on this subject... eh whatever)

How to cook a gourmet (whatever the hell that means) dinner:

Step 1: Send your boyfriend a text inviting him over for a romantic, candlelit home-cooked gourmet dinner.

Step 2: Remember that you are forever alone and don't have a boyfriend.

Step 3: Go buy mass amounts of chocolate and cry about it.

Step 4: Get over it and invite over your grandmother instead.

Step 5: Preheat the oven to 975 degrees

Step 6: Freak out about the fire in your oven and turn it off.

Step 7: Open all your doors to let the smoke out.

Step 8: Get out all the ingredients you need for the recipe you are

Step 9: End up eating most of the ingredients before you even get to
Use them.

Step 10: Spill oil and wine all over your recipe book (umm pffft the
Wine is TOTALLY one of the ingredients, that's why you had it out... heh heh... yeah...)

Step 11: Panic and try to dry it off by taking the book outside and waving it around.

Step 12: Watch in horror as all the pages in your book tear and fly off
Into the wind.

Step 13: Chase hopelessly after the pages down the block screaming
Swear words and having a heart attack.

Step 14: Politely smile and wave awkwardly at your neighbour who
Hates you.

Step 15: Yell an apology across the street to that other neighbour who
REALLY doesn't like you with the little five year old daughter who is
Now repeating all of your colorful vocabulary words you just yelled.

Step 16: Reluctantly accept the fact that your recipes are gone. And also
That you have just contributed to the global problem of littering the

Step 17: Walk back to your smoke-scented house in shame.

Step 18: Look through pictures of scrumptious-looking meals on

Step 19: Get inspired and decide to put your brilliant idea of creating your own recipe into action.

Step 20: Get out your frying pan and throw a bunch of random ingredients in.

Step 21: Put out yet another fire and realize that marshmallows, sprinkles, raisins, baking soda, orange peels and liquid gasoline probably wouldn't have tasted very good together anyway.

Step 22: Wonder what the hell is wrong with you.

Step 23: Get distracted by the television for half an hour.

Step 24: Try to microwave 2 week old mac and cheese you forgot to
Throw out.

Step 25: Watch as your microwave malfunctions and spontaneously

Step 26: Decide to clean it up later because you just cannot even deal
With it right now.

Step 27: Fill a pot with water to make pasta and try to boil the water.

Step 28: Somehow manage to burn the water.

Step 29: Wonder how that even happened?! ! !

Step 30: Give up and call the pizza delivery guy.

Step 31: When you grandmother arrives have her take a seat in the

Step 32: Call an ambulance when she has a heart attack seeing the mess
In your kitchen.

Step 33: Get ready to leave and drive after the ambulance to the
Hospital with your grandmother once the pizza arrives so you can
Bring it with you. Get a call from the pizza place.

Step 34: Listen to the manager explain that your pizza spontaneously
Burst into flames in the oven and they are terribly sorry there will be a
Delay in the delivery due to this.

Step 35: Pass out.

advice,  chance,  cook,  dinner,  eh,  gourmet.

Author: Ember Evanescent
Date: 21/03/2020

№ 1190142

How to cook a poem/poetic theology

~how to cook a poem/poetic theology

So many ways,
But one favored

After oh so many trials
After oh so many errors

Taste tastings, plenty,
Some good, some feh

Some inspired, some liared,
But it's the process

The methodology,
That becomes your
Poetic theology,

How to cook a poem

Slow simmer,
As if it was
A hearty filling stew,
With the red wine,
You flavored,
For style unique

Over it,
Add pinches of
Contradicting adjectives

Icy hot,
Bland spice
And not everything nice,
Bitter herbs,
Fatalistic flaws

Make it
Make the left and the right
Side of the brain
Argue and engage,
Let it taste of the foment,
Of unease, disease,
And the
Coming to terms
With the
Alternating au courant currents,
Of fashionistas

Don't forget
The final seasoning, the finishing
The perfect certainty
Of momentary

Uncovered, derived, home grown,
After a thirty years war,
And the
Perfect uncertainty,
You still aren't sure,
Which side won
And why

Some fry in nastiness,
Some broil,
Flaming to burn away,
Some boast to roast
Of the average angst
That breathing
Seems to

Some peel,
Some imbibe the raw,
All get sorted

For even what
Writ in haste,
All sourced from ingredients,
Taking years of seconds,
In the assembling
The trial and error
The preparation,
Required for living a life
Cooking poetry

cook,  poem,  poetic,  theology.

Author: Still Crazy
Date: 20/03/2020

№ 1177325

A Poet And A Cook

They told me to
Stop thinking so
Much and look at
Me and what I did:
I became a poet, a writer.
A being that thrives
Within its thoughts,
Its imagination-
Anything that its
Brain can cook up
In the limitless pot
That has been given
To it. And I ponder:
I'm someone who eats
Other people's words,
Ingest them in my mind,
Take a selective few of them
To cook a new piece using my own recipe.
And like any cook
Who wants to satisfy
One's hunger, I want
To fill you up-
To the point where
You want more of it,
Even though your head
Is totally full
From my previous serving.

© Ali Qureshi

cook,  poet.

Author: Ali Qureshi
Date: 08/03/2020

№ 1152867


Advanced and Belated my Greetings fare
For the Lone Star Beauty my Summons despite
Having left my Tearful Wantings despair
Then offer it to your Happiness quite
For this Independence judged by your Name
How cool are his Forceps fused into yours,
Nipped your Smile's Edge his Quintessence became
Offered once - twice - then advance into fours
As what any Wise-Stoned Elder would Perscribe
Since Feelings sincere broke the Munchkin's Heart
To lift as the Cross your Saviour subscribe
This One Joy liberate was yours from the Start.
Blessings indeed bill this Sacrosanct Day
Then corral your Fortunes for Candle-Light's Way.

birthday,  cook,  sonnet,  tribute.

Author: Xavier Paolo Josh Mandreza
Date: 15/02/2020

№ 1151433

Cook for me baby!

My momma told me: Son - love comes through the stomach
I sure do love my momma!

My girl told me: I do not cook
I sure am not in love with her!

To Treasure Hunt Love - your cook = your map!

Lets cook for Love baby!

baby,  cook.

Author: GoldenBoii
Date: 13/02/2020

№ 1150900

Can't Cook

I can't fry an egg, sunny side up
Becomes nasty pulp
I'll try to do a roast
But you'll probably end up with beans and toast
I'll try to do a coddle
But it won't be a doddle
If you want cordon bleu
Forget it, but I might attempt a stew
My dessert will probably fill you with mirth
You'd give it a wide berth
I mightn't be a good cook
But if you want a night filled with glee
Come visit me

cook,  t.

Author: Susan O'Reilly
Date: 13/02/2020

№ 1149060

I Don't Cook Dinner

I don't toss or turn in bed,
Or even snore at all
I don't wake you when I rise
But still, I don't cook dinner

I tell you that I love you
Once I see your eyes are open
I let you shower first,
But still, I don't cook dinner

I clean the hairs in the sink,
Put down the toilet seat,
Place dirty clothes in the laundry
But still, I don't cook dinner

I double-check the kids
Make sure they're all prepared
Then hug them all goodbye
But still, I don't cook dinner

I make your pot of coffee,
Leave your keys where you can see,
Let you leave the driveway first,
But still, I don't cook dinner

I have your picture on my wall
That makes me smile every time
You love that diamond wedding ring
But still, I don't cook dinner

I call you at your job
Just to see how you're doing
And let you know when I'll be home
But still, I don't cook dinner

I pick up our kids from school,
Give all their friends rides home,
Collect all the groceries,
But still, I don't cook dinner

I tidy up our house
While their homework's being done
Feed the fish, cat, dog, bird, snake, and tarantula,
But still, I don't cook dinner

I let go of all my friends
That I talk to on AIM or MSN
Excited to hear you come in!
But still, I don't cook dinner

I have the children wash their hands
As I set up the table
Also, I turn off the television,
But still, I don't cook dinner

Everyone sits down to eat,
Expecting a delightful treat
Suddenly you look at me and say,
ВЂњHey, where's the dinner?! ”

cook,  dinner,  don,  t.

Author: Chano Williams
Date: 11/02/2020