Paranoia. Explain it to me. Help me understand the fear that lies within me. Why I suddenly feel that my candle of life, Is quickly burning away at both ends of the stick.
The fear, the fear. It continues to grow. From the seeds of paranoia that I personally sow. Is it all in my head, or is the danger really there? None the less, the uncertainty is what I cannot bear.
Every cigarette I've had. Every time my throat aches. There is no medication for regrets and mistakes. Ignoring the warnings does not make them untrue. Being ignorant can only lead to the downfall of you.
Diabetes or Cancer? Malignant or Benign? Everyone tells me that I'm, *probably fine. But they don't understand that the battle inside, Is convincing myself that it's all in my head.
It's nothing. It's nothing. Miguel, you're okay. These are the mantras that I repeat every day. To myself in my head, or out loud when alone. Hoping that one day my health will atone.
I feel important at times, But I mostly feel worthless and unimportant. People may say I am worth a lot, But it's false. I used to be important, But now I'm torn apart. I've been exploited enough to last a lifetime. My friends are always busy or barely get together with me outside of school, And I feel studying and school work is all that there is to life now that tennis season is over. I just want to go to college already, To get away from a hard life I have always had.
I want to live a life worth living Where we can share the same bed every night Your body on my body until we see the sunrise I can wake up everyday to your beautiful eyes And ill never forget you because you will always be by my side
The chilling tense room if atmosphere so dense Im feeling alarmed, shut of the suspense The cobwebs are common, my smile retracting They're heading for the hills, loud screaming
I'm living in a haunted house of memories Its dangerous, but light I almost see My hearts pounding and soaring The whisper call so scathing
Afraid of dying But cheating death, Always leaving his life in the balance To see where it might Fall.
It's a risky game, One with no clear beginning Or end, This trickiness of living— That's the burden he bears: Living. So he tests the universe's limits, Always pushing, Always tempting Fate, But never waiting around for the Consequences.
It's only a matter of time Before something Finally Gives.
living.
Author: Kassiani
0
Date: 05/04/2020
№ 1206844
Living
I try to write a happy thing Something that's inspiring But nothing seems to come out right I'd rather try to pick a fight Against the world we're living in Full of hate and ripe with sin I've seen the better side of life But those moments seem to end in strife Because the imperfect place in which I live Has nothing more to me to give It doesn't deserve a happy song For everyone to sing along And ignore the reality that surrounds us There's nothing left to discuss Our world no longer has a meaning The importance being what you're gleaning But that's not what our lives are about So I will choose a different route And if it means I walk alone I can't undo the stitch I've sown I've committed to my destiny And it will be enough for me Enough without the false appearance Of happiness and self assurance Fulfilled without the needless bullshit That likes to get my fire lit And this will be my happy thing To forget it all and just start living
